Define 'mum dressing': one of the best articles I've read about it in a while
A thoughtful Linda Wells podcast, how there's limited space for Taylor Swift critique (don't come for me), and a SHOP that's basically my actual wishlist.
LISTEN: Linda Wells being interviewed on the Print is Dead podcast (Apple and Spotify)
This is such an insider-y podcast interview with the warm and candid Linda Wells, the founding editor of Allure. She is just so, well, normal in how she vividly recalls what it was like to get the call from Conde Nast, starting Allure magazine, the town car era of media and what it was like to go brand side to start Flesh at Revlon (if you don’t remember it, it was the ‘prestige, indie’ brand launched by Revlon that well, kind of failed, really). And, it’s brought to you by one of my favourite newsletters,
. I’ve spoken to Wells on the phone before in a former life and she is exactly how she appears on this podcast which really warmed my heart.Some interesting points she makes which has stayed with me: that women who want to work on the fashion side of magazines often have an easier relationship with clothes and their body, versus those who want to work on the beauty side. It might be true to an extent, but I think what draws people to working in the fashion side of magazines is the ability to use clothes that you choose to put on as an instrument to express, to communicate, to convey. It’s not necessarily about wearing clothes and loving it (yes, it can be that too), but it’s an ever-evolving discourse with clothes and what it says about you, and how you want to say it to the world. While she worked on brand side, she admits she loves editorial — she’s back at Air Mail, which, if you’ve been a reader of mine for a while, you know I love.
Having been on both the editorial and brand side, I can genuinely say I enjoyed both. I like how there challenges come from restrictions — I do believe this makes for more innovative outcomes and forces you to think outside of conventions. The benefit of brand side too is that your work touches more than just a website/printed page, and the sheer mass of it all is really exciting for me. I loved the fact that doing something for a brand meant millions of millions could see it and it would impact foot traffic and sales. Editorial though of course has a sense of ‘freedom’ about it, and discourse, and opinion, but I think brand side more than ever before has the ability to also be a part of that discussion.
READ: On Dressing Like A Mum: How New Motherhood Changed My Personal Style, by Ruby Redstone for Elle UK magazine
I loved this story! When I saw the headline I thought it was all about how motherhood made one reconsider what they wore and the whole ‘style identity crisis’ but what a welcome reprieve to read about women who just found motherhood a time where they really honed in on their own style. FINALLY. Being a mum doesn’t mean you need to dress lame. (Don’t come for me.)
From Harling Ross, who has a great Substack
:‘I know that for some women, motherhood makes them reevaluate how they want to dress and why. For me it's weirdly been the opposite,’ she tells me. ‘The through-line of my personal style has felt like a source of much-needed constancy amidst a time of immense change, and I have an even deeper appreciation for the well-worn grooves of the outfits and items that make me feel most like myself.’
Maybe an unpopular, controversial opinion opinion but I find the discourse about ‘mum dressing’ as being all about practical comfort that seems to eject any sense of personality, style or care as being… um, a bit mundane. And not true. And also dismisses the other facets of who we are as humans. Motherhood is a big part but it’s only one part. I derive a lot of enjoyment in what I wear, so personally for me, that whole trope of mums wearing stained trackpants makes me sad. I’m a bit scared of saying this in case I’m like, betraying womanhood or something, but you know, you can still wear clothes you like after birthing a child.
I have often received requests and questions along the lines of “I’m a mum, need a new weekend dress/new flat shoes/etc!” a bit confusing to me because yes, while okay there needs to be an element of practicality to it, it doesn’t mean you adopt a whole new persona because you are now a Mother and cannot wear <insert ‘impractical’ feature such as sequins/mini skirts/low-cut tops/sheer/etc>. How boring. Especially because now, more than ever before, there are so many practical options that don’t eschew fun or style or taste.
I love mini skirts. Ballet flats. Fringing. Sequins. Vintage. Comme des Garçons. Yes, if I’m wearing something embellished I’m going to tell him to make sure my toddler doesn’t pick off the beads. I love a bold earring and the baby used to try to play with them — he’s given up on it now because I’ll tell him off and he’ll get the message. But also I’m of that very ‘Modern Parenting’ ilk where I want us to slot into each others lives, not would prefer not to have me change everything about myself to suit him. (I realise I am still in the early stages of motherhood so it’s easy to say that, and, NEVER SAY NEVER.)
This reminds me of going to a friend’s place and noticing despite having two children under three, she had coffee tables that sat low, very breakable ceramics and other things that didn’t seem at all child-friendly in a conventional sense. Child-proofing was minimal. There was a lot of white and beige that didn’t seem to be stained at all. On her approach, she pointed out that her kids bumped into her travertine coffee table once only: “And then, they learnt to not do it again.”
I’m trying to think about what I no longer wear so much now that I have progeny. High heels? But even that, that’s more a symptom of what’s happening in fashion and not working in an office. Having said that, I stopped wearing vertiginous stilettos years before having children because I just got over how uncomfortable they are — not because of becoming a mother.
But maybe I am fortunate (if I can use the word fortunate in this way because I’m not like, saving the world and this is a very a first world issue) because I like clothes and have quite a strong sense of what I like and don’t like, and going through major life changes hasn’t wavered that.
LISTEN: Khruangbin’s new album
The perfect music to listen to when working or you need to have good music in the background that’s not distracting.
It’s a lot better than another album that was recently released too. I saw this tweet recently on another newsletter, which is 10000% accurate, please don’t come for me Swifties. I’ve said this a few times in this newsletter about other topics.
READ: Swiftie Rehab, by Emma Madden for New York Magazine
And on that note, New York Magazine are so on it as usual with this article, Swiftie Rehab. I think it’s sad that now that there’s so little critical discourse out there about Taylor Swift because people are legitimately fearful; Paste magazine wrote a very negative review (I’d actually say that some parts are accurate, some are just unnecessarily cruel) and tweeted that it won’t be including the byline:
There is no byline on this review due to how, in 2019 when Paste reviewed ‘Lover,’ the writer was sent threats of violence from readers who disagreed with the work. We care more about the safety of our staff than a name attached to an article.
And while we’re here, Cathy Horyn’s The Real Reason Taylor Swift Dresses Like That is also a worthy read from New York Magazine.
(P.S. Before you come for me, I like Taylor Swift, I don’t know if I’d call myself a Swiftie [anymore], I’ve interviewed her and enjoyed the experience and Tree Paine has emailed me telling me off for something I’ve written about her when I worked for a publication and I relished that moment!)
SHOP:
I’m not going to buy the Phoebe Philo leather cape so I’m eyeing off other versions. I LOVE this Nour Hammour but at $1,520, I’m going to pause on this one as well.
This is more in my price range but at $995 you know, it’s not something I’d buy on a whim. This is from Marcela London. I LOVE A CAPE.
Really into this skirt from The Line by K, especially how it’s styled with the grey. I’d usually style everything with black or white so it’s nice to be reminded that you know, you can go crazy and do GREY. This buttercream colour is sold out but will be coming back soon, and it’s also available in black. Also, please comment if the name KARLA DERAS means anything to you; she’s the designer of this brand!
I love the idea of Doen but honestly, their clothes bomb on me because it’s a bit too pretty and Victoriana. But I love this Doen dress! I’d like to wait for it to go on sale, but it’s already sold out once over so my chances are low.
Lie Studio is now at The Undone store. I love how round and bulbous these drop earrings are, and you could wear them with anything. And, they’re 925 sterling silver.
I FAQ I get is for great work totes. This US$178 from Madewell is a GREAT option, and yes, it’s a bit like The Row’s N/S Park tote. But you know, for less. The light tan/beige suede version is also great.
Everyone’s always talking about Dissh, and deservedly so. This black lace detail cami reminds me of old Philo-at-Celine-with-an-accent.
The Victoria Beckham x Mango collaboration has dropped and SO MUCH has sold out already. There’s a few sizes in these pants left; they’re a wool-blend and lined.
A bit Phoebe Philo-y, these Victoria Beckham x Mango sandals have only small sizes left.
Love the cut of this Victoria Beckham x Mango blazer and at US$280/AU$430 it’s pretty decent.
I didn't want my style to change with children but I certainly rethink lux fabrics incase they slime me, platform shoes so I can chase them, big earrings in case they tug them off, anything short so no one sees my breakfast when I'm strapping them in the car. I do have one of those houses that looks like children don't live in it because I've taught them not to trash it but I tried wearing my glam/special clothes around my children and I found myself hesitating to pick them up when they were dirty or let them cry on my shoulder and I was like this is fucked. I'm going to wear kid friendly clothes I don't care about getting dirt/snot/grime on because my kids are more important. When they're older, I'll unlock my daily glam again but until then I'm wearing clothes I can climb in at the park and not panic if it gets blood all over it. 😂
Karla Deras!!! I’ve been following her since Karla’s Closet and the inception of The Line By K! It’s been so nice to see the successes of bloggers from that golden era a la Elin Kling with Toteme, Margaret Zhang with Vogue China, Sara Crampton with The Undone, Chriselle Lim with PHLUR (which I’m desperate to smell and get in Aus).